RIDERGIRL BLOG

In My Dream

I wouldn't have slept in on Christmas. You would have woken us all up and turned on the Christmas music. I can picture you running down the stairs to be first next to the tree in your pajamas and UGG slippers. You would play along to find the Elf and see if Santa (or Sam) ate the cookies and carrots we left for Santa. 

We would start passing out gifts, and you would have given out the first gift, because that's who you were. Always giving to others. You would have something handcrafted for Mom and Dad that you made yourself. Gifts we would treasure for the rest of our life, just like the ones you gave us since you were so little. 

We would also get a blank card from you, with a treasured saying from your heart. Not something Hallmark wrote, but something you wrote. For dad, you might get a card that played a funny song. You loved to make him laugh. But for me, you'd write a beautiful card that I would add to my collection from you, Zak and Dad. For Zak, you'd get a goofy card making him laugh, but making sure he knew you loved him. On the other hand, if you happened to be annoyed with him, you may have thrown it at him.

What would we give you?  I have a feeling you would have asked for money to cure cancer. We'd do that, but also give you the world of things we wanted you to enjoy. You would have been a whole year older, and surely needed new clothes! Maybe a bra (sorry to embarrass you!) You were starting a shoe fetish, so cool shoes would have been in order. Maybe a phone lens because you liked taking pictures and making videos. Of course, we'd give you a nice iTunes gift card since you loved music, and offer to arrange a movie outing with your friends to watch Daddy's Home since you loved slapstick comedy. New boots for riding and saddle blankets would be wrapped waiting for you to use them next time you saw PJ. I'm sure Dad would have found a special piece of jewelry. And Zak? Well, he is very good at giving meaningful cards. The present might be modest but it's from his heart and you'd save it just like you saved everything he gave you.

After unwrapping gifts, and many kisses, hugs and "I love you's" shared, we'd eat breakfast. Chocolate chip pancakes would be on the menu of course, with plenty of whipped cream. We'd talk about the next year, and when we were going to Vail and California. You'd be chasing Sam, and trying hard to train him like you trained Gabby.

The rest of the day would be hanging out and cooking. You and Dad would be preparing the bird, stuffing, gravy and veggies. You were always Dad's chef and helper. I would be squeezing in the kitchen to make dessert, while getting stared down by you and Dad for invading your space. Zak would be lying on the couch watching TV.

You loved Christmas. You loved our family. We love Christmas because of our time together and the lifetime of memories we create. Today, we feel your energy all around us. You're here with us; you haven't left us. You continue to be a full participant in our time together as a family. Nothing has changed. I hope you feel our joy. Thank you for being here and continuing to be with us for the rest of our lives. We only want you to happy and free, full of joy and laughter. We love you Naya. Merry Christmas babe.

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